fear....strength...peace and then yeah recovered...done

Think the past two weeks were filled with ups and downs.
Fear, as i had pain, tot really am gg to lose my vital parts and slowly die, and also thot abt all my dreams/ unfulfilled tasks, etc. flashed past my mind.

Strength coz after fear, dun want fear, thus ask God, asked frens and cell grp to pray for me....then PEACE....gd to hear from God thru the frens who prayed and their encouragement. There was a sis-in-christ who even scolded me...heez, coz i was negative, and prepared for the worst kinda person. Tho' i fully trust in God, i dun believe i shd nt be subject to sickness...and to the extent thot: death is good too. Thus, it is a negative mindset which has a "depressing tendency", bad.
I realised, even if i dun fear death, i shd nt look towrds death. God has my life and time in hands, i shd not be asking for death. Certainly nt death as a "Way-out". Tho' i wld never commit suicide, my mind is sort of 'quite often' tending towrrds negativity/prepared-for-the-worst

As i am writing this, jus done my biopsy....thk God for the doctor, Karen Yap and nurse. They really were gentle, friendly and explained quite a bit. And, they were patient to go through the steps to warn me of the 'gun-like' sounds as the needle/equipment went into the lump and 'bang', in, extract, out.
=p

Thk God too for speaking so directly to doc Karen Yap that she knew exactly when to address the question I hv in my mind, and answer the exact queries i hv (abt her and abt the lump).
Most of all, thk God for being there as I sense His protection over me and accurate analysis/ skills performed by the doc.
I could almst hear the breathing from doc Karen Yap- i guess she could sense God's presence. =0)
Thk God for His love !